More than a year of the cultural tidal wave that was the #MeToo movement has resulted in a long, long list of indictments against badly behaved men in Hollywood. What about here in Singapore? As the only man on the Buro. editorial team, I decided to hand the mic over to all the women in my office in honour of International Women’s Day with a simple question: “What should men stop doing?” From what I gathered, communication and empathy seem to be leading concerns in the workplace. While it might be hard for men to get over the cultural conditioning of stilted emotional maturity, 2019 might just be the year we’ll start to see a decline in rape, stealthing and other non-consensual sexual advances. I’ve got my fingers crossed.
“Men need to stop pretending that women’s experiences (and that’s everything from ‘chick-lit’ to feminist theory) aren’t relatable. We also shouldn’t need to be somebody’s daughter, sister, friend or mother to have worth, or be worth more, as a human being.” — Ryan Sng
“I wish men would stop wearing socks with sandals and think that it’s cool. On a more serious note, they should stop being so condescending about things like cars. I don’t care if I can’t tell what a car brand is.” — Emily Heng
“Stop mansplaining. For example, when I mentioned I was going through some pain during a doctor’s visit, he shrugged it off and told me that I had sprained something. As a woman, you know your body well enough to understand what kind of pain you’re experiencing. Besides that, telling me how to do my job, talking over me when I’m explaining something or answering for me after you’ve asked me a question — that’s mansplaining. Stop doing that.” — Hazel Vincent De Paul
“Stop objectifying and catcalling women. Catcalling still happens in Singapore. Whistling and ‘meowing’ at women is not the right way to get a woman’s attention. It could be as simple as a hi or hello. Men don’t have to make animal sounds. In this day and age, I’m surprised that men stoop down to that level just to greet women in public.” — Allisa Noraini
“We shouldn’t make blanket statements about all men. Be a good, decent and slightly old-fashioned gentleman. All women would be able to appreciate that.” — Crystal Lee
“Stop belittling women. Men think they are often superior, especially in terms of organisational skills. In recent times, it’s evident that women are on the rise. However, with regards to promotion and pay increments, there’s always been a disparity between the genders.” — Audrey Yeo
“Be more accommodating and look out for women everywhere, not just in the workplace.” — Marina Persikova
“Be more trustworthy in every way. Based on my personal experiences, men need to be more reliable to their spouse, family, friends and co-workers.” — Archana Gowda
“Men should stop thinking that girls put on make-up to impress them. I enjoy putting on make-up for myself.” — June Chen
“Listen.” — Janice Sim
“Men should stop raping women, whether its rape or rape-adjacents acts such as pulling out the condom midway through sex and any other forms of sexual assault, sex abuse and sex speech that’s unwarranted. Men could also be more open about their emotions. I’m tired of the stereotype that men don’t feel anything. They are a lot more protective of them, but I believe the world would be a better place if all of us could be a little more honest and open with how we feel.” — Jolene Khor
“Stop referring to women as hysterical or crazy.” — Charmaine Tai
International Women’s Day falls on 8 March 2019. Celebrate being female at these inspiring events.
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