After a 2018 full of emotional turmoil and personal growth, the Alexander McQueen girl has come to the conclusion that the greatest gift she has to give this holiday season is: herself. She dresses accordingly.
Dissatisfied with her unglamorous casting as “the ass” in the church nativity, Miss D&G will attend rehearsals in a zebra outfit, and persuade the entire company that at some point, they had roamed Palestine and been domesticated as livestock.
Guilt-ridden over the debauched year she’s had, the Louis Vuitton girl hopes her angelic Midnight Mass outfit will convince the Lord that she has turned over a new leaf.
The year’s climate disasters have done little good for the nerves of the paranoid, survivalist Balenciaga girl. But, bundled up in her triple-layered parka, she now feels slightly better about her odds for surviving the winter.
Things have been a little more than tense at work lately. To minimise contact with her colleagues/nemeses, Gucci Girl 1 plans to show up to the office Christmas party with one helluva ice-maker.
Gucci Girl 2, even less fond of yuletide boozing and schmoozing, is treating herself to a solitary Game of Thrones marathon in anticipation of the show’s return next year. To her, nothing says “Christmas” quite like gratuitous gore and sexposition.
Her friends and family deem it childish, but the Galliano girl continues to observe her childhood tradition of attending the NYCB’s annual performances of The Nutcracker, dressed as the sugarplum fairy.
Miss Dior dreads facing the nosy relatives and family friends at her mother’s annual Christmas bash. Unwilling to endure another year of “good-natured” badgering about her relationship status, she'll let her Christmas sweater do all the talking.
Having booked tickets extra-early to secure cheap flights to the Maldives for New Year’s, the Gareth Pugh girl is doing the most to avoid falling sick before the journey — with a full-faced, no, full-headed, anti-germ mask.
Despite the threat posed to ski resorts by global warming, the Alexander Wang girl is headed straight for the slopes. She intends on death-staring Mother Nature from behind her skinny sunglasses until the bish coughs up the powder.
Torn between two equally pretty Christmas luncheon ensembles, the Kenzo girl has decided to have her cake and eat it, too. Hitherto a conservative dresser, she wonders if the makings of a street style star had been in her all along.
La fille Jacquemus is feeling festive and down to party, having found the perfect, food baby-ready dress. There will be no holding her back from the canapés this year.